Thanks! I might as well just tell it now. I’ve told this story a few times in person, but here it is, immortalized forever on the interwebs.
Okay so last year I had to attend these summer meetings for a class I was taking during the year. It’s a small class already and not everyone in the class attended the meetings, since they were extra credit, so there were usually 4-5 people there. So at the end of one of these meetings, one of the guys (we’ll call him R) suggests that we all go out to eat. The one person in the class I already knew had to go to work, but the only other guy there seems down for it and I figure I might as well meet the people I’m going to be spending all year with, so I say sure.
So we all get into this guy’s car, and he wants to go to Qboda. Well, the only Qdoba near us is closed, and he is Bound and Determined to go (I’d never been there before so I couldn’t really object), so we have a long car ride ahead of us.
Now, I generally try to stay away from politics, and the class we’d been meeting for was Government, so I’m not too keen on getting into everyone’s beliefs, but R wastes no time. “So,” he asks me, “where are you on the political spectrum?”
"Well, I consider myself pretty liberal, I guess." I reply. He asks me to elaborate. "I mean, I suppose I’m more liberal socially," I say, "rather than economically, because I don’t actually know a ton about economics so I’d like to be more educated before I take a position on that. But I consider myself pretty liberal socially."
"Can you give an example?" he replies, evidently trying to get a good grasp on where I was politically.
"Well…" Now, at this point I wasn’t sure just how out I was willing to be. I’d already told my close friends, family members, and basically anyone whose opinion on my orientation mattered to me, but I wasn’t in the habit of outing myself to complete strangers yet (that came later). But I figured I was confident enough in my ability to debate sexuality issues, and it was a common enough issue that I felt I wouldn’t have to explain it to him, and I didn’t actually have to out myself. "For example, I think same-sex marriage should be legal."
"Oh." And his opinion very obviously differs. "Well, I think that gay people should be able to have civil unions, but they don’t need to call it marriage. Civil unions have basically the same rights as a marriage anyways."
At this point I considered outing myself, but I’ve noticed that letting someone know that you’re gay tends to completely shut down debate on gay rights, and, as I mentioned earlier, I was confident enough in my ability to debate sexuality issues, so I figured this would be a nice debate to have and I didn’t want to end it just yet. I started to say something, but he said that he didn’t like debating on an empty stomach, so he wanted to wait until we got to the restaurant, and I said that was fine.
On the car ride, we discussed many other topics, such as feminism (he wasn’t a fan) and whether his friend (who we picked up along the way) wearing a “cool story babe, now make me a sandwich” shirt was horribly offensive or not.
We were nearing the restaurant. “So, what’s your opinion on abortion?” he asks. Evidently R is leaving nothing unmentioned.
"Well, I’m pro-choice," I replied. He was not.
"I mean, I would never get an abortion," he said.
"Of course you wouldn’t, you don’t have a uterus."
The guy driving laughed. R was defensive. “Well, would YOU ever get an abortion?”
I thought about it for a bit, and then said, “Well, I haven’t really thought about it, because I don’t really plan on getting pregnant.”
This was a shock for all three boys in the car. “Wait, like, EVER?” the guy driving asked.
"Is this one of your feminist things?” R asked.
At this point, I’d concluded this guy was a grade A asshole and that I was kind of over this whole conversation, so I didn’t really care about preserving my ability to debate same-sex marriage. “No, it’s one of my LESBIAN things!”
The entire car flipped out. Thankfully we parked right at that moment as everyone in the car shouted and realized they’d tried to debate same-sex marriage with an ACTUAL GAY PERSON. I was laughing.
On the way into the restaurant, R made sure to apologize profusely to me and assure me that he would be COMPLETELY OKAY with it if gay people could get married, essentially 180-ing on his entire earlier argument.
So that’s the story. I’m sure it’s a lot funnier when I actually tell it as opposed to spending an hour typing it, but here it is. I would like to make a note that throughout the year, R did manage to grow and expand his worldview, and at the end of the year he managed to do a presentation on the LGBT community that, while not exactly enthusiastic, was nonoffensive and showed that he’d learned quite a bit, and if that’s not some Lifetime movie shit right there then I don’t know what is.
(I would also like to note that it is entirely possible for me to be a girl who dates girls and still get pregnant, since not all the girls I date are guaranteed to be cis, but “i’m a lesbian” was the most clever rebuttal I could come up with in the heat of the moment and I didn’t consider that it might’ve been exclusionary towards trans people until later. Sorry.)#long post #nonbinaryeldritchhorror